Dinner Debate

I have always heard about how important it is for your family to sit down and eat dinner together. You know, the whole "family togetherness" and all that. It is a time to be together, talk to each other, and just connect after a long day of work, school, chores, errands, whatever.

And really, our family is able to sit down, all five of us, and eat dinner together most every night.



Like tonight.



We were able to have quite a meaningful conversation. Charlotte and Barrett were debating the difference between calling something a "peepee head" and a "poopoo head."



Charlotte feels that "peepee head" is what you call someone or something you don't like or don't understand, or that you just want to call a name. According to her, "peepee head" is plenty descriptive.



Barrett is of the opinion that "peepee head" is just not enough. He feels that "poopoo head" is much better.

They went back and forth; a five-year-old and a four-year-old trying to convince everyone else at the table that their word of choice was the best one.

I bet you are all so jealous of our meaningful and stimulating conversation. I know you're just so sad that you weren't at our house for dinner tonight, so that you could offer your opinion, and choose a side.

So, what are your thoughts? I need a vote- who sides with Bear, and who sides with Charlotte?

A Reverse Recommendation....

Just in case any of you are in the market for, or are interested in,
a home security/alarm system, I thought I might make a recommendation, in reverse.....

Avoid this security company at all costs:

Seriously, they have been a total nightmare.
If Satan himself comes to your door selling an alarm system, buy from him before you buy from Radius.

And that's all I can say. But, if anyone needs more details or information, I have plenty of Radius Security-caused "bad mood" left over, so I can rehash all of my gripes and issues at any time.

Grrrrrr.

And the winner is.....

Barrett!!!

Barrett is quite an athlete. Don't let his small stature fool you, the little dude is tough! There are many times when he and I play "football" during the day. Of course, it is Barrett's interpretation of football, meaning there is no actual 'ball' that we use. Bear's style of football is more like 100% tackle. He'll randomly shout "Mom, watch this!" and then run at me full-speed, pummel me, and quite often, knock me flat. He is a tackle maniac!

Today I was cleaning the bathrooms. Not really one of my favorite ways to pass the time, but oh well.
But, as I was in the middle of cleaning the bathtub, I hear a bit of yelling, and, assuming it is still Charlotte and Bear playing downstairs, I (kind of) ignore it.
Bad move, Dani!!

Next thing I know, there is a rushing sound, and then the feeling of a 31-pound handsome little devil slamming into me at full force!

I can now tell you exactly how Clorox disinfecting bathroom
cleaner tastes.
Yuck.
On so many levels, yuck.

The score stands thus:

Barrett: 1 million, Mom: 0

I Hate Nature...

I am not a fan of nature.
Not. At. All.

Today, as the gale-force winds were blowing, and making all the trees sway and bend and curve in a manner most bizarre and unpleasant, a terrible thing happened.

Nature happened.

In our front yard, there is a lovely, albeit small, red maple tree. In the upper branches of that tree, sits a little robin's nest.
My kids have had such a fun time this spring, watching the Mama Robin fly away to get food for her babies, and then coming back again with a beak full of dangly little worms. They have loved having the Nature Channel right in their own front yard.

Until today.

The horrific winds were blowing hard enough to knock all three of the baby robins out of the nest. Sadly, one of them did not survive the fall. The other two did.

And that presents another crime of nature. Mama Robin will likely abandon the baby birds now that I have tried to "save" them. I can't take care of them, and even if I could get them back up in their cozy little nest, Mama Robin will just push them right back out.

The defenseless, helpless, and innocent little baby robins
are going to die.

I hate nature.

The color wheel....

You know you love your daughter when.......

You allow her to pick out your nail polish color, and then, stick with what she picks, even if the color she chooses is this:

Yep, a delightful shade of pink Charlotte calls "Pretty as a Princess Pink." OPI calls it "Panda-monium Pink." Either way, it reminds me of cotton candy or Pepto-Bismol, and it is generally a color that I would not choose for myself. At all. I much prefer colors that are slightly more dramatic and moody, such as:

"Be Still My Heart," or, as OPI calls is, "Bastille My Heart." I like this color. A lot.

It is definitely one of my favorites. But, to be very honest....

This is my very most favorite color: "Black Magic."

I LOVE THIS COLOR!

It seems just as moody and cynical and pessimistic as I am.

But, because I love Charlotte, and because I love that she is so pink and fluffy and twirly-girly, I let her pick out the color, knowing full well that she would probably pick out a color that secretly makes me think of Pepto-Bismol.

So, now every time I look down and see my fingernails, I think of upset tummies from eating way too much cotton candy, and therefore, choking down Pepto.

Sure do love you, Charlotte.

Next time, I pick the color!

Happy Birthday!!!

Happy Birthday Colby!

You're the caramel in my Twix, and the salt on my popcorn.

Sure do love and adore you, Handsome Man!!!

Pop Quiz

Just a quick Pop Quiz. Very important. Take your time, and answer each question honestly, and truthfully, to the best of your abilities.

1. Dani thinks that:
A. Spiders are the literal spawn of Satan.

B. God created spiders in His fury over Adam and Eve partaking of the Forbidden Fruit.

C. Spiders are the very embodiment of Evil on the earth.

D. All of the above.

2. Dani wishes that:
A. Spiders, every single species, would magically and eternally disappear from existence.

B. All spiders would, at the very least, stay at least 3 million miles away from her.

C. All books and movies portraying spiders as kind, adorable creatures could be banned.

D. All of the above.

3. Despite her intense and burning hatred of spiders, Dani:
A. Is far too chicken to actually squash them.

B. Prefers to send in her cats to "play" with the spiders until they die, and then she will vacuum them up.

C. Will spray them with spider spray, hairspray, window cleaner, or any other remotely poisonous and/or noxious substance, hoping that they die a slow and miserable and tortuous death, and will then vacuum them up.

D. All of the above.


Okay, time! Pencils up.

The answer to every question was D, All of the above.
How did you do on this quiz?


As much as I am ready for warm weather, and the absence of snow and temperatures hovering at 30, I have to admit,

I HATE SPIDERS!!!!!

How is it possible that even with the dratted snowy February-like weather the last few days, the little eight-legged demons from hell have made their way into my house?

3 of them just today. I was really hoping that the evil creatures would react more like tomato plants, and that they would just shrivel up and freeze and die in this ridiculous cold snap.

No such luck.

I need a lot more hairspray..........

Because Everyone Already Knows......

Savannah likes the Jonas Brothers!! No matter how much she may try to deny it, she does. In fact, she LOVES the Jonas Brothers. I don't know that it even matters all that much which Jonas Brother you choose- she likes them all...a lot! Just in case you have doubts, Savannah has a Jonas Brothers CD, a concert DVD, and bedding.

Let me explain the bedding, because it is crucial to the whole point of this post.

So, Savannah has a brand-new bedroom. It is HERS; she no longer has to share with Charlotte. She's very excited about this, not only because it's more space, but because she gets to decorate her own room to her own liking- it doesn't have to be purple, pink, and Princessy anymore, because Charlotte can have that in her own room. Yay for Savannah! So, she picked out her room decor, and for her birthday, she received a Jonas Brothers super-soft blanket, a Jonas Brothers throw pillow, and a Jonas Brothers sheet set. This is in addition to the Jonas Brothers poster she received for Christmas. She placed the poster on the wall, directly above her bed, so that when she lays down, she can see the very cute, hot and handsome Jonas Brothers smiling down upon her, as she is laying on the pillow with the cute Jonas Brothers on it.

You get the idea.....she loves the Jonas Brothers, despite any and all protestations to the contrary.

Which brings me to today. I was (sort of!) teasing her about the Jonas Brothers, which (anyone who knows Savannah will already have guessed that it) did not excite her, or please her at all. I was (sort of!) teasing her about the perfect arrangement of the poster, the bedding, and all other things related to the Jonas Brothers. She eventually told me to stop teasing her, because it makes her feel embarrassed, and "how would you like it if I teased you?" I asked what she meant; how could she tease me? She just said "What if I told everyone that you thought someone was cute, and it made you embarrassed?"

So, I had to explain something to her.
Oh, Savannah, my dear, the thing is, I happen to have a major crush on someone, and I have since about 1985. And, pretty much everyone knows, too, so you couldn't really tease or embarrass me by telling everyone about it!!
I tried to tell her that if she likes those cute little Jonas Brothers, she shouldn't be shy about it, or try to hide it, or deny it.

Proclaim that love and adoration, Savannah!!


But, to try and make amends with Savannah, and to make her feel better, I posted one of my favorite pictures of my
(not so) secret crush.
So, here he is, Dani's major crush for about 25 years running....

The one and only, the delicious and perfect Martin Gore.

Isn't he adorable?!! I still swoon over this guy.

And, for the record Savannah, if I could find a pillowcase with Martin on it, I'd be all over it!! And I would buy the matching super-soft blanket, and pretty much anything else!

And for further record, just in case anyone is reading this post with growing panic and alarm, Colby is aware of, and fully supports my Martin crush. Don't worry, I know that Colby is the most awesome, the most handsome, the most amazing and hot guy ever to walk the earth.
I adore him.
The thing is, Colby is very secure in my love for him, so he is by no means threatened or scared of my decades-long, rapturous crush on Martin. He even downloads and sends me pictures of Martin. He was fully aware of my Martin crush when we met; he was fully aware that it was still there when we got married; and he is still aware of it now, thirteen blissful years later. Everyone okay? Good.

By the way, to all those who may be younger than I am..........if you must ask me who Martin Gore is, I reserve the right to sigh condescendingly, and then smack you.....but I will mean it in the nicest possible way!!!!

It is so easy....

I have decided that boys are soooooo easy to entertain.

This morning, I was messing around with the settings on my e-mail, and we came across a new background/theme for it:

Ninjas.

Well, obviously, Barrett thought I shouldn't pass that up, and so now, my e-mail page looks as though Snake Eyes has gotten the best of it.

Now he has told me about 20 times in the last 20 minutes "Mom, we need to check your e-mail."

I have a sneaky suspicion that he really doesn't care in the slightest about my e-mails, it's just that he is as excited to see the Ninjas all over the screen the 20th time as he was the first time.

And now he is dashing around the house in all his Snake Eyes gear, happy as can be.

It takes so little!

Battle Cry.....

This happened a while ago, and I thought I had already blogged it, but apparently I didn't, so, better late then never!!

Back in February, our family watched the Olympics. We love the Olympics, and the kids really liked it, especially figure skating, snowboard halfpipe, and the ski jumps. But, during the men's figure skating, there was a short little bio of Russian skater Yevgeny Plushenko. Well, Barrett LOVED watching him skate, and actually thought that his name was just about the coolest thing he'd ever heard. For days after, he would take his sword, his gun, his shield, or whatever weapon he happened to have, and then, before attacking whatever nefarious foe he was up against, he would shout "Yevgeny Plushenko!" and advance toward the enemy with deadly speed and force. Or, if he ever tripped, fell down, or otherwise hurt himself, he would say "ouch, yevgeny plushenko!"
That guy's name became Barrett's all-purpose expression: a battle cry, an expression of anger or hurt, you name it.
It was sooo funny, and I wish I had caught it on camera for you. He was so cute, and it was just adorable to see him, sword raised, face drawn in concentration, and then his adorable little-boy voice shout, at the top of his lungs, "Yevgeny Plushenko!"

So cute! How I love that little boy of mine!!

The Most Creative Award...

Charlotte has decided that she no longer wants to take naps during the day. Yes, I do realize that she is five, and that many kids her age haven't been taking naps for quite some time now. But, only in the last few weeks has she expressed her displeasure about naptime.
But, today, she told me that she couldn't take naps anymore, and it took every ounce of self-restraint I had to not laugh, because it was soooooo funny.
Charlotte takes the award for
"Most Clever and Creative Way To Get Out Of Doing Something"
for telling me this:

"I can't take naps now, because I am allergic to naps. Mom, do you know what "allergic" means?"

And then she proceeded to explain to me the definition of "allergic:"
'it means you really hate something.'

Huh.
So Charlotte is allergic to naps, and by her definition of the word, I am allergic to spiders, tomatoes, jelly beans, and the horribly
over-rated music of U2.

What kinds of things are you "allergic" to?!?!?

Barrett rocks!

I have already explained why my kids are the coolest, and yet, here I offer further proof.........

when we clean the house, I always put in a CD or two, and rock out. I mean, if I have to clean, why not at least have an awesome soundtrack to the cleaning, right? So this morning, it was Barrett's turn to pick the "cleaning music." His choice.........Yep, Dead or Alive!! And if that isn't cool enough, his second choice was........

The awesome Pet Shop Boys.

See, my son is soooooo cool! He picked out two very sweet CDs to listen to, all on his own, without any coaching or persuasion on my part!
Just don't tell my darling sister Steph!

Top Five Lists

I know it has been a while. So I thought I might post a few things that have been on my mind the past little bit. Nothing tremendously important, or amazing, or groundbreaking, but, oh well!


The Top 5 Reasons I Love Barrett:
1. At this point, I think he has the cutest and most adorable little voice in the universe. Seriously. I could listen to him talk all day long, and just smile. It is kind of hard to get angry at him, or try to discipline him sometimes. His little-boy voice is just sooooooo adorable, I usually melt. Love it.

2. He has an adorable smile and giggle!!

3. He is quite a Super Hero geek, just like his Daddy. Maybe it should concern me, but it doesn't. There is something completely and utterly adorable about a nearly-four-year-old boy who can hum the Superman theme music; who lifts his arms up, and before taking off at a ridiculously fast pace, says "To the rescue!!" and other such Hero geekiness. I kind of hope he never outgrows it. Batman Forever, Bear Bear!!

4. He makes the funniest faces! He has a wide range of smiles and smirks and lopsided grins that just make me laugh!!

5. This is my favorite, mostly because I think it will most likely become a less and less frequent occurrence as he gets older. So I cherish it for now. Barrett will come up to me, at totally random times during the day, and say "Mom, I so much love you." Or he will say things like "Mom, you are such a pretty girl," or other such (sweet and sincere) lies that he has learned from hearing his Dad say them to me all the time. I am sure that the day will eventually come when he won't tell me how he so much loves me, or that he thinks I am a pretty girl- that would be a total cramp in his style. Oh, how I do love my little Barrett!

Top 5 Reasons I Love Charlotte:
1. Once again, her delicate and fragile and girlie voice. She just sounds like a Princess, and I love that about her. She is so girlie, and so twirly, and so fluffy, and so Princessy, but in a good way. Love it!

2. She is soooooooo sassy! Maybe this should bother me more, but, for some reason, it just doesn't. Charlotte has some serious fire and sass in her personality, and I love it. She actually reminds me of my Granny East. She was a tiny thing, not even 5 feet tall, about 90 pounds at the most, but she was a spunky and fiery and sassy lady! I loved that about her, and I love that Charlotte has some of that. Granny passed away when I was in high school, so Charlotte never had the chance to meet her here, but I am sure that Granny was teaching Charlotte up in heaven, making sure that the sass and fire keeps going.

3. She likes to read. The same books and stories, over and over and over and over and over again, but I love it. I am glad that she loves to read.

4. Her favorite colors are Pink, Light Pink, Dark Pink, Princess Pink, Tinkerbell Pink, Baby Pink, Shockingly Bright Pink, Cotton Candy Pink, and any other variation and shade of pink that you could possibly imagine. Pink Power forever, Charlotte!!!!!

5. Her awesome and funny face that she makes whenever she "plays" Guitar Hero with Colby. She likes to "play" the bass, and she takes it very seriously. She makes the most focused, concentrated, and Rock Star Chick face ever. I love it!


Top 5 Reasons I Love Savannah:
1. She has the most enormous deep green eyes I have ever seen! I LOVE her eyes. I always said that if I ever had kids, that all I wanted was for them to have Colby's eyes. They can suffer through life with whatever they were unfortunate enough to inherit from me, but at least inherit their father's huge, amazingly deep green eyes. If they get his excellent vision as well, even better....so far, so good on that!

2. Her tender, emotional and sincere little heart. Savannah is the most sensitive and sweet girl in the universe. And what's more important and amazing, is that she is incredibly sincere as well. She is not in the least fake or artificial, she really is very sweet, kind, and loving. I love it.

3. She pretends that she doesn't have a massive crush on the Jonas Brothers, which I think is sooo funny and cute. She gets all red and embarrassed whenever anyone brings it up, and it's just funny. But, she really does like them, and she really thinks they're soooooooooo cute, and it is so adorable. I wonder if my parents thought it was funny and adorable when I was her age, and had a major thing for Martin Gore. Oh wait, I still do......oh well, don't judge me.

4. She pretends to like me, and to think it's okay if I am "myself" around her friends. Now, that may not seem like a big deal, but, let's be honest- I am really kind of a dork, and kinda crazy, and to a nine year old, that spells certain doom if ever her friends see that. Bless her heart, she likes me anyway, despite my innate nerdiness!!

5. She is such a Daddy's girl. I cannot even tell you how much I love that. It just makes my whole heart swell with joy whenever I see her with Colby. She adores him, and she loves being with him, and playing with him, and talking to him. Honestly, it does make me a teeny bit jealous sometimes (or a lot of the time), but I really do love how much she loves him, and looks up to him.


And, finally, my darling sister Steph's Top 5 Reasons Why I Should Be A Little Worried and Embarrassed and Concerned:
1. All three of my kids know ABBA songs. Lyrics, humming the tune, the whole thing. They have a disco thing going on, and it just disturbs Steph greatly!

2. They all know Depeche Mode songs. Same thing, lyrics, music, all of it. Very sad, to Steph.

3. They all know Erasure songs. Even sadder than Depeche Mode, according to Steph!

4. They all love New Orleans Saints football. Well, as much as Charlotte can love football, anyway...... But, this is plain devastating, because Steph thinks the Oakland Raiders are the only team that should exist in football.

5. That I do not color, highlight, or otherwise "improve" my hair!! I keep trying to tell her that it is a wasted effort, because my hair is sooooo blonde that any color just fades in a week, at the most; and I can't highlight any lighter, or I'd look like a platinum blonde bimbo, and I just don't think I could pull that look off even if I wanted to; plus, I just don't care enough. Which, to Steph, is the most sad and grievous part of it all, I should care more about my hair, my clothes, whatever, and I just don't. Oh well. At least I really love baseball, and my favorite team is the Boston Red Sox, so that has saved me in her eyes, at least a little!!!!!

Because I Love Him!!!!

I happen to adore my Colby!!

He is the coolest, most awesome and funny guy in the universe.

Today we celebrate our 13th wedding anniversary.

Happy Anniversary, Colby!

Here's to us!!!

Charlotte's New Pictures

These are the new pictures of Charlotte! I cannot believe my little baby girl is going to be FIVE!! Where has the time gone? She had such a fun time getting her picture taken, she really does love being in front of the camera. She is such a doll, and we love her so much! Enjoy!

This is one of my favorites! I love how excited she was at having a bunch of flowers in the picture!

And then, tossing them up in the air!

Funny face!

Flower girl!

Another silly funny face! How come she is still so pretty and cute when she makes funny faces?!!

So pretty!

I love this picture. First of all, I am a sucker for a sepia-tone photo, and second, this just captures Charlotte's personality so well. Mellow, laid-back, and relaxed!

Look how tall she has gotten!!

I love this picture! She looks so sweet and angelic. Love it!

This pose was one of Charlotte's ideas. She wanted to hug her knees and show the photographer her cute lime-green socks! She is so funny!

Charlotte LOVES this picture. She was quite pleased to have the biggest pink flower right by her face.

I must admit, this one is my very favorite! There is just something about her funny little personality that really shines through in this picture! I love it!

So, there you have it- the latest and greatest pictures of my
Darling, Sweet, Adorable, Lovely, Funny, Gorgeous Blue-Eyed Beauty!